POSSUM QUEEN
Speaking of beauty pageants, the only crown I ever managed to snag was in my senior year of high school, Miss Whirlwind. Don’t ask! When I went off to college, that
being the only title I had ever possessed, I proudly listed it on my recommendation for
sorority rush. Isabella later confided to me the sisters got a big laugh off that one. She said
that during rush they half expected to see a whirling dervish come spinning through the
door. Being the sweet Southern gals they are, they let me in the sorority anyway, bless
their pea-pickin’ hearts. My children still fall into gales of laughter whenever they see that
title next to my name in my high school yearbook. But at least it wasn’t Possum Queen. I
know what you’re thinking, but I’m not making this up. In the little town of Wausau, in the
Florida Panhandle, they crown a Possum Queen every year complete with a Possum
Festival. They even eat the stuff.
This brings me to an incident that happened a few years after I got married. My husband had given me a mink jacket for our anniversary. Today I wouldn’t dream of
wearing mink, what with PETA throwing paint on you and all. But back then I admit I was
more than a little proud of that mink jacket. One cold Sunday (that would be below ninety
degrees in the South) I strutted into Sunday School in my new coat. I was practically
preening I am sure. There was a very nice, young couple who had recently joined our
class. The young man was a friendly, gregarious sort, quite tall and husky as my
grandmother would say. After conversing with him, it was obvious he had been raised and
bred in the woods—way back in the woods. Leaving Sunday School that morning, he
yelled to me in his robust voice, “That shor is a purty coat. Is it possum?” Now I know what
you’re thinking. He was joking, right? Well, you’re wrong. He was dead serious. With a
very red face, I muttered something about not being sure exactly what animal it was. Poor
mink, I bet he’s the only mink in the universe that’s been mistaken for a possum. But I
stand my ground. At least I was never Possum Queen.
| ||||||
